Monday, August 18, 2008
the end of the screaming
As James mentioned, Jake has a tendency to scream when he is unhappy (when you move him away from the kitty food dish, when you take an electrical cord out of his mouth, when you put him down and he wants to be held, etc). It seems like a natural response for an 8 1/2 month old baby who can't yet communicate with words but wants to let his displeasure be known. The problem is, we obviously don't want to encourage this as a form of communication and it makes Finn think that screaming gets you to pay attention to him as well. So we have been saying "no" in a stern voice and then when he does it again, we put him in his crib for about 1-2 minutes or until he calms down. There are obvious allowances for hunger, tiredness or physical pain that get other sorts of responses but for the most part we are trying to be consistent so that he gets the idea--when he screams, he does not get what he wants. But this method has worked a bit haltingly, partly because there are other children to deal with and also, between James, Scott and me, sometimes the reactions vary. So what do you think Mand? How would you want him to be disciplined, not just for screaming but for other behaviors yet to come up? I know we don't want him to have a bad association with his bed either but I know for Finn, his crib was the easiest, clearest way to isolate him. Any thoughts or anything you would have us do differently?
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I think saying no and then following the screaming with time in the crib seems very reasonable. I don't think the bad association with the crib should be a big deal right now as long as he sleeps when he's supposed to. I guess consistency is the key. Is Scott the "good cop"? We'll have to chat about that.
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